1.05.09: Tweezers

While sauntering down my apartment's staircase today, I was humming a little tune, sliding my hand down the bannister and got the most wicked splinter I have ever had. It was at least a quarter of an inch long (which is long). It was like someone had purposely inserted a crudely painted toothpick just under the pad of my thumb for, I don't know, some sort of secret weapon or party trick. For lack of a better term, it hurt like a bitch. So I postponed my trip to the store, walked as calmly as I could to my bathroom, and proceeded to remove said splinter from my thumb. This took upwards of fifteen minutes. It was so huge. Its hugeness cannot be underestimated. And after it was out, all I thought about was how amazing tweezers are. I could have kissed those tweezers. I love tweezers. If I were on a desert island, the first thing I want - over music, books, flint, whatever - would be tweezers.